Its good to be home

Its good to be home from my weekend away. Its good to sleep in my own bed again. Are you like me in that the first couple nights in a new place or on a different bed tends not to lead to the best sleep? (Besides the fact that your children are in a new place too and they don't sleep so well so you have them in bed with you at 3 a.m. and a dog who decides she's cold so would also like to sleep with you.)

Here in snowy Sherman I again don't want to leave my house and go out in the cold weather so we stay inside and the kids are about ready to pop they just want to go somewhere. I don't really want to take them out because I don't want to go in the snow and they have nasty coughs that I don't want to deal with outside the home either. They are driving me crazy though. I spent around 15 minutes making a purple construction paper alligator for Derek, he saw one on the cover of the construction paper booklet, only to have him get bored with it in 15 minutes and end up ripping it up and throwing it away. Needless to say wasted time, and I hate to waste my time. That's why I sit here on the computer and type away!

They have discovered the joys of having a sibling to fight with. I don't get it one minute they are hugging and cuddly the next they are wrestling around on the floor bashing each other off the bean bags and furniture. Some of it is malicious and some of it is just something to do, but I will need to curb the wrestling/fighting today!

We are in the midst of a bidding battle. Who will hold out who will win? This for me is one of the hardest things. My husband makes the financial decisions in our family. I am sometimes left without very much knowledge as to what is going on for us financially. Patience is not the strongest virtue of mine either and so here I sit in a quandary: will he make a bid, how much will he bid, will they accept this new offer, is there a middle ground here or is this the end? For those of you who have bought a house before you can understand what I am saying. For those of you who don't own a home or just built one its no fun this bidding game. I would like the issue to be settled and into a new house by March. To much to ask? (I really don't know the answer to that question, it might actually be totally unreasonable to think.)

Anyway here I sit with out any writing on the wall. Do you think the new Christians who saw the fiery finger writing on the wall to tell them what they should do understood the privileged they had? I know that faith and trust are important and waiting upon the Lord for answers is what He is asking me to do today so I will surrender to his will and call on him for the strength and endurance to make it through the bidding war and accept the answers what ever they may be.

The waiting game

Well we have put a bid on a house in the village of Sherman. For those of you who are new to my blog I live in western New York, which by the way is absolutely nothing like New York City even though my vote in an national election means nothing because the democrats totally dominate our state, in a small dairy community. The Town of Sherman isn't even big enough to be called a city. There are about 1500 people who live in Sherman, that might be an over guess too, where the school is located they call the village. Our church is in the village too. Actually almost everything we do except swim is in the village. (We swim in a pond by our trailer right now and the neighbor's pool, they live 1/4 of a mile down the road.) We are making a big decision to put a bid on a house but it really is time. I want to live in the village. I would have friends who would be my neighbors and also everything would be in walking distance. Wow would it save on gas. Also it would just be a change in scenery for the better for me. I am tired of my four little walls and in a house I could let my personality out. For the longest time in this trailer Tim did not want me to waste my time in making this a home I was proud of, meaning painting the walls. Just this fall though he finally relented and said it was okay if I painted our bathroom and bedroom. I did the bathroom in a celery green color and the bedroom in a forest green color. They both turned out really nice and there are no more flowers and stripes on the walls any more. That is the luxury I am looking for in moving into a house. The house is old but it could take on my personality easier than a trailer could. So pray they they will either accept the bid or make us a counter offer that we can afford.

On another note I have been getting kind of strung out with my kids lately. Maybe its the fact that we are finally snow trapped. Or maybe its the fact that I haven't had a break from them in a long time. What ever it is I am irritable! The luxury I have in my mind is that the celebration of the 30th birthdays is right around the corner. There are nine of us who have stayed in touch since we graduated from Grove City College. In the year 2007 seven of us turn 30! We decided to splurge on ourselves and have a spa weekend!! That is the happy thought that keeps me pressing on when I am tired and strung out and needing a break. A weekend of just girls, some pregnant, all married, all believers it will be an incredible weekend. I thank my God upon every remembrance of them. Philippians 1:3 Italics mine.

Me and my family going to the Dentist today!

Its been two years since Tim and I have been to the Dentist. We figured it was high time we go. The last time I went, which was before Sarah was born, I had two cavities. You can only imagine what I came home with today. Four cavities, yes thats right four cavities, and also the prospect of a root canal and crowns for my front teeth. I was in an accident when I was in middle school and have had to deal with bonding and breaking teeth and not very pretty teeth for many years. The doctor would really like me to just be done with that kind of thing and get the caps. I have to say this was the first time I was anxious about going to the Dentist. I wasn't sure what he was going to tell me and also what he was going to tell me about my son. Derek has a black spot between his teeth and I was really worried they were going to tell me his teeth were dead. The short of it is he has cavities also. Its really hard when you brush your sons teeth every day to know what else to do. I guess from what I understand bad teeth run in Tim's family so I will have to do my best to take care of my childrens teeth as best as I can. Wish us luck and give us lots of prayers=)!!

think, think, think...

Ever feel like Pooh Bear and you just think, think, think... I think and think so much through out the day. I find that there are hardly ever times in the day where my mind is just relaxed and absorbing things. Right now my husband and I are in the process of deciding if we should buy a house. Living in a single wide trailer hasn't been that bad until recently. Derek just turned four and Sarah is 2 1/2 she will be three this summer. We are just growing out of our house. We also have an 80 pound dog who takes up a ton of room herself. So the thinking thing keeps going on and on in my mind do we buy or not. Is the basement a problem or not? Is there actually anything that could be to wrong with the place that we won't buy it? Do we get a home inspector first or should we just make an offer? The thoughts go round and round in my head all day long. I really would just like to shut it off sometimes.

Derek turns 4

I can hardly believe that my son is four. I never dreamed I would see my kids past the age of four. For some reason I always believed that the Lord would return before they were four or something. But here we are and Derek is now four. I love my little son he is such a good boy. Right now he and Sarah are playing restaurant and they are making strawberry juice and calzones for each other in the kitchen. We had a pizza party at Vincenzo's which is a new restaurant that opened in Sherman. The owner is one of the members at our church and a good friend of our family. I was able to help him wiht his restaurant by making his menu for him and he has been very generous to our family. When then came home to our home and had a Diego cake. I wasn't planning on a Diego cake I was hoping to Bambi but we couldn't find any party supplies to do Bambi. We found supplies for Diego and so that is what we did. He got nice toys and games we have been playing Hungry Hungry Hippos and Guess Who? non-stop for the last few days! We only had family in the forms of My Parents, brother and his wife, and my in-laws. It was a great time and we all had a lot of fun. Derek got to eat lunch between his grandmothers and they all were very happy. So he is four and will begin school next year. Crazy I know but all in God's plan for us to grow up, yes!

Christmas...

When asked about how my Christmas was I am unsure of what to say. Christmas is a blessed time to remember the gift of a Savior in Jesus Christ, but it can be lost in the hustle and bustle of life. This year was actually very different for me personally. Did my children get gifts and really love them? Yes. Was my family together and did we share in that loving company? Yes. Did I get the gifts that I wanted? Yes, all except I really wanted a quesadilla maker and didn't get that, but... Here is where it gets tricky, Tim's Grandmother passed away a week and a half before Christmas and so there was a funeral a week before Christmas where all kinds of extended family came into town. Then Christmas being such a family time it was overshadowed a bit by spiritual tensions and spiritual conversations. Do I want to do all I can in my life to worship the one true God, obey His commands and honor Him in my life so that all others see Him in me? Yes of course I do! I love my Savior but was very challenged in some spiritual areas of my life that I feel I fall short in. So, how was my Christmas, wonderful yet overshadowed with loss and a feeling of inadequacy. I pray that next year I will say there is no more feeling of inadequacy as I strive my hardest to please my heavenly father and grow in my relationship with Him.

Medical Emergency

My Great Grandmother on Tim's side, Grandma Furman, had a stroke yesterday. We got a call from a lady at our church yesterday at 4:30, right after the Steeler game started and Becky said, "Have you talked to your mother-in-law yet?" I said, "No!" She then says, "You call me if you need anything." "Becky, you have to tell me what this means, its okay you just can't leave it like this." "There was a 911 call made that there was an unresponsive female, possibly a stroke at your in-laws house." I got off the phone with Becky and it rang immediately again and my Mother-in-law was on the phone holding grandma not knowing where Dad was and wondering if the paramedic's were coming. I told her we were on out way to her and we would see her soon. I called my good friends who live down the road and asked if Derek and Sarah could come to their house until we figured out what was going on. Its easy to let the things of this world lie football games fall to the way side when you family needs you. The end of the story goes something like this. The hospital did acknowledge that Grandma had a stroke but they didn't have sophisticated enough equipment so they sent her to another hospital. She needs a more extensive MRI and can get that in Erie, PA instead of the smaller hospital in Westfield, NY. So when I spoke to my mother-in-law this morning they were on their way to the hospital to see if they could get any answers or direction. Grandma was responsive last night and seemed to be doing well. We were joking around and having real conversations so that was very good. Just keep Grandma Furman in your prayers this can happen out of the blue and be unexpected. I praise the God of the Universe for sending His son to be my Savior and also the ultimate protector and healer. I was so thankful that we had a God who loves us last night when it looked that things were really bad. I was also grateful when Grandma seemed to be doing better. I just was for wisdom for the doctors that they can diagnose what was wrong and maybe help her some way.

I Love Country Living!

This is a story for my college friends...
This is a story to make them laugh...
This is a story about a horse, an Amish girl and boy, and me...

I was sitting on my couch the Wednesday before Thanksgiving. My dog was outside tied to her leash when out of the corner of my eye I saw something dark and big run by my back window. Now living out in the country as I do I wondered what was that? Three thoughts went through my mine, deer, bear, or something else? I went to the back door to see if I could see what has gone racing by my window when he ran into view. Prince the neighbors horse. He had gotten loose from his corral and here he was in my back yard. Not just my back yard but also my side yard and then right up on the sidewalk in my front yard. Prince is an ornery who has a mind of his own. One of the Amish girls was in the yard chasing him but he would not come to her and ran from her when ever she tried to get close. In the process of running from her he was tearing up my front yard. The story ends with me going to the Amish school to get the Amish neighbor's son so he could come home and get the horse to obey him. Can't you just see it the Yankee girl pulls into the driveway of the Amish school house and asks for Jacob and he comes with me. I was so nervous they would be afraid because of what happened to the poor Amish school where that man killed the girls. But Jacob came and saved the day and Prince was taken back to his barn and dealt with. And just to prove my story I took a picture. So Megan is proud of me for having a quarter of a cow in my freezer and horses grazing by my front sidewalk. Who would have thought I was born for country living?!

Thanksgiving Travels

We traveled to Milwaukee,Wisconsin for Thanksgiving with Tim's sitter Karina and her family. We hadn't been there for five years or so it was a very special time. We traveled in the night on Wednesday arriving in Milwaukee at 3:30 in the morning. The kids were wonderful they actually slept for most of the time after dinner. Then on Thursday we just hung out at the house, they don't have an antenna hooked to their TV so no football for me all weekend. That's has probably the hardest part of the trip for me!! (Read my confessions, confessions blog!) We didn't have your conventional Turkey thanksgiving meal but prime rib instead. Very, very good prime rib! We also went to my brother-in-laws work place where he is a mechanic for a private jet company and so we toured a luxury jet, what a cool experience. On Friday we went to the Milwaukee Zoo, spending most of the day there it was a lot of fun to have my children experiencing all kinds of animals and seeing it through their eyes. Derek's favorite was the baby spider monkey and I have to say I agree with him, the spider monkey was really cute. Flipping around and fooling around. Then on Saturday we went to the Milwaukee Museum. Another fun time but a bit harder with a three and two year old. We went into one of those fake villages from the old days and Derek did not like the fake people in there. Admittedly they are weird aren't they! Sunday we left Milwaukee to go to Tim's second sister's house Lori to pick up two bedroom suite for our children. They are getting new furniture for their children and offered us their stuff. Now realize that the things they are getting rid of are Amish made real cherry wood so it is great stuff. Stuff that we would never consider buying for ourselves. Its beautiful! Then we arrived at my parents house at midnight. It was a long day in the car and we still were not home yet. On Monday morning when Tim returned the UHaul trailer the kids and I went and visited Grandma B in school, they really liked seeing where she worked. Then we came home and arrived here in Sherman by noon. Tim went off to work and didn't get home until 8. We are here and getting back into the swing of things. We are decorated for Christmas with our lights outside and everything but the tree up inside. I believe we are getting the tree Friday night and that will be a ton of fun! So have a beautiful December all.

Confessions Confessions

Over the last few months a few of us have decided to do this confession thing. I have no idea what to write actually but I think I'll give it a try.

General comment: I too laugh at inappropriate times. When someone trips and falls my first response is to laugh then I realize maybe I should go check and see if they are okay. My mother-in-law did this one year at a Christmas party she was excited it was her turn to pick out a present that she went prancing up to the front only to fall on her face trying to get to the present table, I couldn't not stop giggling! Its horrid when you don't even stop to think if she is hurt first.

So here are the confessions I think:

1. I like to read Christian fiction novels. If I am in a really good one there is the potential that at my nothing will get done at my house until the book is done.

2. I am excited about painting my house, but am sick to death of painting. I am the one who wants to make the changes but if I have to see another paint roller in the next few days I'll cry. (You will find me crying tomorrow because I have to put the second coat of green on my bedroom walls.)

3. I love football. No I mean it I love football. Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Thursday when ever it is on I want to watch it. On Sunday the kids ask to watch something of their shows and we say no we are watching football. The kids ask for us to read them a book we say no we're watching football. Maybe this is a healthy addiction I am not sure. To expand further on this confession we also got Dish Network at our house just so we could watch Monday night football on ESPN. I know what can I say I love football.

4. I wish all the time I was more trendy. I love others clothes and hair and I am just to inept myself to carry off the trendy clothes. I live in a small farming town and am not overly exposed to trends but when I am I feel way out of style. I used to say my only clothes that were in style were my maternity clothes and that was four years ago. Three years ago when I had my Sarah I realized that not even my maternity clothes were in style I was wearing tents for clothes instead of showing that I was pregnant instead of heavy. Sad to reread what I wrote ,I am embarrassed, but I care, I really do.

5. I have a problem with soap operas, oh my goodness I can't believe that I might admit to this. I know their horrid, I know that Jesus wants me to have nothing to do with them. And since we have satellite TV now I don't watch them as often but I really struggle with them. Its the classic, stay at home mom thing trying to get lost in someone else's world. Pray for me!

6. I am overly involved at church. I don't do anything outside of church. My only friends are friends from church, or my friends that live out of state. The other day I said that I am actually sick of church, not Jesus my Savior but the church building itself, I am there all the time. Because my father-in-law is the pastor of the church and my mother -in-law is the secretary of the church when we go into town to visit them we go to church. During the week I have Awana, Youth Group, and regular church on Sunday morning and night. I truthfully have no idea what to do about this admission though.

I think that is enough confessions for the moment I need to go recoup from this. If you are wondering these came out a lot faster and easier than I thought they would. Its easy to confess things once you get started.

Halloween Pix

The lion and the lamb! They loved halloween! Derek would say trick or treat no problem but Sarah cowered by her Dad most of the time until Derek went for the candy bowl and then so would she. Toddlers are so fun!

Branching out

I am trying something new. I am helping a friend of mine from church design and create a menu for the new Italian restaurant he is opening. This has been an on going process. From deciding which direction to go color wise, to pictures and descriptions. Just today we worked on it together for two hours on the descriptions and we have over half of them done. He is very excited about it and it is pretty cool to see a finished product.

Halloween is fun

I love to dress up and play make believe. Derek is a lot like that too. He was so excited about Halloween last night. He wants it to be every day and not just for the candy, because he loves that! But for the dressing up. He really wanted to be a lion and a lady from church had a lion costume that I dressed him up in. She also had a lamb costume and so I took the lion and the lamb around for Halloween. Not only does He live in my heart but they trick-or-treated well too! I tried to dress up I really wanted to be Queen Esther but I couldn't find the right outfit and I got a little stressed out about it. Last night I planned and hosted the Awana Family Fun Night it went off really well. I told a salvation pumpkin story and we also had a pumpkin poem read. Then we went downstairs at church for doughnuts and cider and games. Over all it was a good night. I lost my voice though and am feeling pretty awful today. My throat hurts to swallow, I am taking Day Quil to feel better and hopefully it will help. I hope that all who read this had a fun Halloween and had fun with dressing up and pretending you were someone else for awile!!

Busy Week

Do you ever feel that you are a hampster on an exercise wheel and you just keep running and getting no where? My week has been like that. I have been busy since last Friday and I don't really know when there will be an end. Last Friday my sister-in-law was in town and because she lives in Indiana and I see her around two weeks a year, more if we are lucky, I wanted to spend as much time with her as I could. She was staying with my in-laws and so I spent all day Friday, Saturday, and Sunday at their house only coming home to sleep. Then Monday I didn't have anything going on except that I was staying, over night this tume, at my in-laws house. They went to a conference and since GG (Great Grandma) lives with them they needed a house sitter and a GG sitter. That night I didn't have any plans and then due to rough weather conditions, SNOW, I put my in-laws car (they borrowed mine to go to the conference) 100 feet off the road down a steep embankment. Luckily no one was hurt including the car. The wreacher got the car out of the gully the next day. Tuesday night was Awana, Wednesday night regular youth group and prayer meeting night at church. Tonight due to the fact that my husband is now a deacon and its Pastor Appreciation month the deacons and wives are taking Preacher out for dinner. Tomorrow night we scheduled a teen outing to a corn maze, fun but tiring after the number of events this week. Then Saturday and Sunday we have a conference of seminars at our church, that could be really great, most likelly will be great, but again tiring after the week I've had. Then its back to Monday and I really don't think I will have to do anything but sit and watch monday night football and recover from a hectic last week and a half. My goodness once you see it in writing it really doesn't get better huh! I hope you all have a less exciting week than I am and a more peaceful, enjoyable week.

Car accidents are scary

Last night on my way into Sherman from my home I took my in-laws car off the road 50 feet in the snow down a hill. God protected me from hitting a street sign, and also from hitting trees. I was really blessed to drive the car forward down the hill instead of going in side ways and flipping the car down the hill. My children were in the car, buckeled into their seats thankfully. I know that God is wiht me and protects me daily but I always marvel when His evidence is very clear. It was almost like the Frnak Peretti book, This Present Darkness when the angels wrestle with the demons to keep the van safe. The angels were guiding the car down the hill when it easily could have been flipping or slamming into objects. I do not believe that I have done any damage to the car. The area I went down is more field than anything else and so who knows exactly what I could have run into on the way down but God is good, Amen!?!

Just random thoughts

I had a rough week last week. We spent a lot of time thinking about whether or not we were going to buy a house. Trying to get a loan on a house that is more than you are going to actually pay for the house is harder than it looks or than you might think. We had a hard time figuring out how we would ever pay for a house that needed so many repairs. It wasn't just new carpet, and a good cleaning. It was a dirt floor in the basement and also holes from the basement to the outside. Its the leak in the bathroom its the unexplained leak in the kitchen the falling down ceiling in the kitchen. The mold all over the house, which is most likely from being closed up for a few months. The fact that its in town and we have a big dog that is used to the country and might not do well in a town. The price was right, the location is great but the cons outweigh the pros and so with God's leading and both of us agreeing upon it we decided not to persue the house. The instant relief was proof positive that we had decided the right thing. Now I am going to look into painting the house I live in now and turn it into a home. I'm happier now.

It's been forever

Well its been a long time since I have shared my thoughts with anyone. Yesterday I had a frustrating experience that filtered through my entire day. I had someone get upset with me about the choice of words I used. Instead of saying that I would ask this person to check on something i used the word tell. For those of you who know me you know I am not the type of person to make anyone do something that I might say, "I think it would be a good idea for you to check this out". That to me is telling the person but the end result is them thinking they had the idea in the first place. The frustrating part is that the person who argued with me is supposed to know me and their case wasn't even bery well made. I was so distracted by the confrontation though that it bothered me all afternoon and even into the evening. When I told my husband about it he understood what I was saying and it always helps when someone else understands you. I had to write an apology note to the Lord because I was so out of it during my devotions. I needed to pray about releasing the bitterness that I felt toward the situation. I sometimes hang onto things to long and am trying to work through that depending on the Lord for forgiveness and release. Anyone ever feel they just aren't good at the forget part of forgive? Praise the Lord that he is faithful to forgive and forget so that our sins are not held against us. I am trying to become more like Him daily in that and all areas of my life.

To Unload or Not To Unload

There are times in life where a good unloading of the heart and mind are in order. The first time I realized this I think I was six when I realized that Jesus Christ needed to be my Savior because there is nothing without him. The next time I remember feeling the need to unload was at my mom and dofferent ages and instead of handling myself with dignity and grace I went off on her, most likely about nothing other than what to wear the next day to school, (things were always much bigger for me back then.) Now that I am married and have a spouse to unload upon I realize that I need the grace that God has supplied. I read in a Marriage counseling book that Guys hear through "blue" hearing aids and see through "blue" sunglasses, meaning there is a male tint to everything they hear and see. Meanwhile Ladies hear through "pink" hearing aids and see through "pink" sunglasses, meaning there is a female tint to everything we hear and see. If you don't realize that the hearing aids and sunglasses are in place then unloading can become a weapon of mass destruction. If you do notice that the hearing aids and sunglasses are in place and use a measure of understanding then unloading can release pent up emotion and not destroy the fragile walls of marriage. If only we could instill in our children, teens, and men and women around society that these hearing aids and sunglasses exist even in the form of parental, sibling, spouse, co-worker, boss wouldn't society be a little more calm? Who knows but the fact of the matter is when going to unload be sure that you are using the grace God has given you before doing so. Did you also know that unloading does not always mean fighting. I need to go daily and unload at the cross of Christ. I need to unload the sin that so easily entangles. The things I do not want to do I do, and the things I want to do I do not, thank you Apostle Paul for being so forthright, thank you God for leading Paul to write out your word. I find that if I do not unload my sinful nature it rears its ugly head at all the wrong times. I get irritated about my daughter's potty training and take it out on someone else. I want to be included in things but not overwhelmed by them. I want to have a day where I get to do everything that I want to do, woah selfish ugly monster rearing its ugly head beware,beware. Sometimes unloading can just be random blogging so that you have someone to talk with when its raining out side and the people you most want to see and talk with live in different states. Yes you know who I am talking about, I am talking to you! Sometimes unloading can also be a way to express a happy emotion that your friend whose husband has been in Iraq for the last year has now come home and you can not being to let them know how happy you are for them and that you pray their transition will go smoothly, and hope she found just the right pair of jeans!

We've turned a corner

Sarah is doing great with the potty training now. Last night after dinner she told us she had to go and since then she hasn't had an accident. Even all day at church she didn't go in her pull-up. I had her in a pull-up just in case she had an accident. She did great, we went out to dinner at a friends and she was comfortable enough to tell us she has to go and did while we were there. I can not express how impressed with my little girl I am right now. She is so wonderful. For all of you waiting to potty train, make it through the first 24 hours and it will get better. Perserverance develops character, and character hope and hope does not dissappoint!

Potty Training

What a lot of hard work. I am literally exhausted, its 2:00 in the afternoon we started at 12:30 and every 20 minutes we ride the "Potty Train". Sarah hasn't actually gove in the potty yet but we are trying and that does count. Its hard having to be upbeat all the time and to put on a happy face. Potty is exciting because I will not have to change diapers any more but I am tired of false happy face already and it hasn't even been two hours yet. They are off to rest time now though and so a few episodes of Grey's Anatomy and maybe I will feel more like an adult again!